Let's talk about the word "need" (09/21/19)

Let's talk about the word "need".

I find it interesting that the word "want" used to mean "need", and now a lot of people use "need" when they really mean "want". I have had conversations with people about redefining what we actually need in life vs what we just really want. Here are my thoughts.

First of all, I think it is important to realize that when we say we need something, we are inherently implying a desired solution to a problem, and we need to identify what the problem is. You may say you need a new car, but what you are seeking is reliable transportation. You may say you need a new pair of shoes, but what you are seeking is to have comfortable feet while maintaining a certain social image. You may say you need food and air, but what you are seeking is to stay alive. All of these examples are valid, however the problem is different in each case.

The next time you catch yourself saying that you need something, I encourage you to take a moment and ask what the problem is that you are trying to resolve. If you find yourself saying that you "NEEEED" things that you really just want, you are implying that your happiness is dependent on you attaining that thing.

While it may seem trivial, I believe that words have power and that what we tell ourselves matters. If you say you need something, ask yourself why, and then call it what it is. I have been very surprised at how it changes my perspective when I acknowledge that I don't actually need something, but would really like to have it. It usually makes me move on and forget about it.

If you find yourself obsessing over something that you already determined you don't need, start exploring what it is that you're trying to resolve. Ask yourself why you want it so badly. It may lead you on an interesting journey.

Keep in mind that "need" is generally a practical solution, whereas "want" is usually emotional. The line can get blurry when you run a business that requires certain tools, and you love buying those tools, so it's important to learn how to distinguish between a "want" and a true "need". If you can objectively outline the problem that you are trying to resolve, you can determine why you need it. Otherwise, it may just be something you want. Now, if you can afford it, and you've acknowledged that it's strictly something you want, knock yourself out. Just be honest with yourself.

In summary, don't let your happiness rely on material possessions. If telling yourself that you need something is implying that you won't be happy without it, you will never be truly happy. Search for the why. Redefine as needed.